Today was one of those days that I had to keep repeating to myself... "be grateful for your many blessings, be grateful for your many blessings." Needless to say, it was a rough one! We should have known when the day started off and our dogs, Disco and Groovy, ran downstairs, knocked down the gate and Disco promptly urinated on the hardwood floor right by the door to go outside. Should have gone back to bed and called it a day. But we marched on. I won't go into too many details, just suffice it to say that I wish my biggest concern with my two year old right now was panties or pull-ups, (like many of her same aged peers who DON'T have Autism.) But as my mom pointed out, "that's just not the hand you were dealt." True enough. Aside from the no napping, fussy, almost kicked out of the grocery store kind of day that it was, we made it to 6:45 pm, (the time right now) and I am enjoying a glass of much deserved wine while Avery fights her way to sleep up in her room.
It is now about 15 hours since I wrote the above paragraph, and our night was much like our day yesterday as our kids took turns all night waking up crying. Today is a new day! Now, I am chugging some coffee and half watching Avery and Kaylee play in their respective corners of the family room. Sweet, sweet girls. Anyway, back to the point of my post. Making decisions for our children is so hard sometimes. We want to make wise,informed choices when it comes to shaping their futures, but being sure you are doing that is not always easy. I had our fall completely lined up for Avery with therapy and preschool jamming our days full. I got a call this week that a spot opened at a place in downtown Dallas that I have had her on the waiting list for since last January. That particular program meets Mondays through Thursdays for 2 hours each morning. The problem is... we can't do that, and the preschool we have already paid for (that is also great but not specifically designed for special needs kiddos,) and all of her other therapies. So now is the time to sit with pen and paper and weigh the pros and cons. The problem is, we don't know how she is going to respond to either program! Ughh. So, I realize now I am being a bit redundant and probably getting close to the edge of boring the crap out of you, so I will move on. Let's just all hope and pray we can be enlightened and stunningly aware as we create the format for which to heal and help Autism.
3 comments:
Trust in yourself that you will make the right decisions. As parents, we all make mistakes but it lets our children know that we aren't perfect either. Thinking of you, Melissa
I have so many things that I want to say and I don't know where to start. The most important thing to do is pray. Pray Pray Pray that the Lord will lead you in the right direction. Rely on him, lean on him for your strength, wisdom, and courage to see you through. If you ever need to talk just give me a call. I don't know what you are feeling or going through, but I can listen and encourage. I think that as mother's we all beat ourselves up. We need to keep encouraging eachother no matter what we are dealing with. I will be lifting you and your family up in prayer. Let me know if you need anything.
Wow! You are an incredible mother! i have read thru your blog and so many thoughts and prayers have come to mind. In Atlanta, I helped with a fundraiser for my passion of childhood cancer. It's called the Tribute to Quiet Heroes..It's to honor the mothers of children with cancer. After reading your blog and learning more about raising your beautiful girls, it's clear more needs to be done to support research and honor the incredible mothers who do anything and everything to heal and help their children...I go to sleep tonight praying for your family and your upcoming decisions!
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